Graffiti is trash!

Day Three Hundred & Twelve: 1/29/2024

Made it through another Monday. It felt rather uneventful which is the type of night that I prefer. Yes, there were spaces that were a mess. Yes, these children don’t know how to push in a goddamn chair. Yes, my tasks are necessary to maintain the space. It was a usual day, through and through. I managed not to break anything or cause any destruction in my path as I traveled from room to room.

I’m not saying that I want to cause mayhem and destruction, but sometimes you see something foul. Something so annoying that your only response is chaotic and erratic. Instances that make you question your entire decision making process.

None of this occurred, thankfully.

Day Three Hundred & Thirteen: 1/30/2024

Another night of uneventful work. I mean I have my little annoyances from space to space, but overall. I wasn’t mad at the state of the building. I greatly appreciate this after we were told to do some extra deep cleaning in our areas. It wasn’t extensive, but to reiterate…I don’t want to do extra work. I want to finish my duties and then have time to write.

Anyway, I did have time to make some much needed headway on Magick Caste Archive, Part Three. It’s up to 184 pages as of this evening. I had originally planned to finish the book before the end of the calendar year, but I decided to work on a more pressing project. So, now I’m actively working every day and I’m hoping to be complete before the end of March. We shall see. For now, I’m falling back into my rigid routine of working out, writing, working, and repeating. By sticking to a routine, I generally find myself in a better mood and I get so much done!

Day Three Hundred & Fourteen: 1/31/2024

I want to say that I’ve been humbled by this experience, but I’m more indigent than anything else. I get so annoyed when I see food wrappers on the classroom floor. There really shouldn’t be any food in the classrooms to begin with, but these teachers apparently don’t stick to these rules. Then, they wonder why we have fucking mice everywhere.

Now the bathrooms are a whole level onto themselves. I’m so frustrated with the defacement of the bathroom stalls. These bitches literally carved words into the wall as if they are some sort of useless hoodrat. This is a fucking art school. There shouldn’t be any need for mutilation of any school property. I won’t stand to hear, ‘kids will be kids.’ These are supposed to be some of the best kids in the whole city. You have to audition to come here. You have to want to be here. Then, why destroy what is handed to you? If I had the tools I would grind the words down and repaint. Except, that’s not really an option. We aren't given the tools, a whole other crew has to come out and correct the walls and stalls.

Also, I don’t have the patience and I refuse to make concessions for the bad behavior. I barely tolerate my job because it’s all that I have to pay the bills while I work on my writing career. I’m fed up with the stupidity that I have to just tolerate. For the time being I’m The Teal Fairy, but Craig is seething on the inside. Sometimes I even vocalize my frustration.

I wonder if I would have a different attitude about the student body if I knew them more personally, but I don’t have a relationship with them. That's the nature of the job. They don’t really talk to me and if they do they want something rather than wanting to know me. Do I look menacing?

Okay, now that I’m done venting I can express my gratitude to those that make me feel like there is a community here. There were some kind students that took a few moments to compliment my efforts on social media or my overall look. I appreciate that, I just wish these moments could fulfill me throughout my eight hour shift.

Day Three Hundred & Fifteen: 2/1/2024

I don’t think I did a very good job last night. I say this regularly, I only want to put in the bare minimum of effort. However, I feel extremely guilty when I don’t feel like I did the minimum. Even if it’s only slightly below the level of expectations, I do feel guilty for not putting in the effort. This doesn’t happen regularly because I feel like I am putting in the effort. To note, I don’t have some lofty goal of being the best custodian ever. It’s just not my aspiration. Though, I don’t want to be the worst. Gosh, how embarrassing would that be?

Okay, I was having a panic before work. My anxiety got the best of me. So, I over painted my face and decided to showcase a more extreme look for the day. I needed something to help elevate my confidence. Though, it wasn’t warranted. No one said anything to me today. So, the fear that I was experiencing was my own anxiety rather than actual issues permeating because of my own inadequacies.

I’m trying to do better today, because if we get our evaluation I don’t want to be the reason that we get a low score. I don’t mind being a slacker, but I don’t want to be the cause of added pressure upon my superiors. I’m just trying to get through each day.

Okay! So I started my day in fear that I underperformed. Now, at the end of the day I’m just annoyed. The ONE thing that makes me more mad than anything else is finding graffiti and or any type of markings on the stalls and walls. This is an art school. Any defacement is a spit in the face of the institution and just shows me that there are brats that have no regard or respect for this space. How dare you! How absolutely dare you act like literal trash.

Day Three Hundred & Sixteen: 2/2/2024

Made it through the week! An accomplishment in itself. My favorite activity this week has been incorporating the purple. I tried to have a significantly different look each day. It felt important for me to go beyond my usual teal attire. I need to express myself. As frustrated that I feel about my job, I know that I can still showcase my creativity each day. That’s how I get through the muck.

I finished the work week, feeling a little bit less annoyed today then I was yesterday. I’m not sure if posting the pics of the bathroom help, but I’m going to keep it going to shame those that are involved. Perhaps, the word will spread and it will suppress the delinquency. Either way, the week is over.

I really enjoyed the purple looks this week, but I’m ready to get back into my usual teal attire on Monday. Teal and turquoise have become my signature colors. I still get so many compliments on how these colors enhance my eyes. So, might as well keep the compliments flowing. Right?